Well, lovies, it’s been a few weeks, so let’s jump right back in… and it seems we kick it all off right where we left off.
Things begin right after Rayna slapped the tar out of Deacon when he told her he had cancer. Back in one another’s arms, she apologizes for the slap. Then she swears she’ll never let him go. Wow. Are they having a moment or writing a country song?
Back at Layla’s place, she finally wakes up without Creepy (AKA Jeff) at her house. Instead, he calls and says she has an interview with a blogger at Merchants. Merchants? Um… what? That is where us music journalists would go to rub elbows with mucky muck label and management people. And we sure as hell never interviewed artists in public. Well, never in a public place that wasn’t roped or VIP’d off.
The Triple Exes (still hate that band name) are piled onto their Prevost to tour with Rascal Flatulence and four hours into the trip, Avery is calling home to check in with his baby mama. But Juliette reassures him that the baby isn’t due for 3 weeks and he’ll be home in 3 days.
Back in her Sherpa gear, Scarlett is a bit quiet on the bus as they head to Chicago. (I’d consider that a blessing.) When Gunnar asks her what’s wrong, she points out that the last show she did in the Windy City, she ended up crying and screaming under a piano, well on her way to crazy town. Then the Triple Chex Mixes all snuggle in for a Twittter selfie.
Teddy meets up with some random guy who could give Creepy a run for his money. He explains to Creepy #2 his hooker under surveillance problem.
At the recording studio, Will has a great song on his hands thanks to the hot 'mo songwriter Kevin, who is accompanying him on guitar. Puke comes in and likes what he hears. As the three chat, Kevin puts a friendly hand on Will’s shoulder and Will tries to be sneaky and pulls away.
At the sobfest that is Rayna and Deacon, Rayna is pulling a Scarlett and rattling off every treatment option she can come up with and Deacon explains the transplant list is his last hope. When she says that they will wait together, he tells her point blank “I can’t do this with you by my side.” Wow. Your liver is bad, Deacon, but don’t go killing her heart. Anyway, he goes on to explain that he already put Rayna through hell and he isn’t going to do it again. When Rayna protests, he brings up how she made a lot of choices (marrying Teddy, not telling him about Maddie, engagement to Luke) without checking with him. So he is deciding to fight this cancer without her. Okay, I was listening closely and he said nothing about getting through it without me. I am going to assume that is an invite to dinner at his house.
At the recording studio, and fresh off her big GMA interview where she told the world about her psycho ex-husband, Sadie runs into someone equally as disgusting – Puke. They have an awkward little chat (ya know, because she’s all "Team Rayna") and even more awkwardly part ways.
Layla is late for her blogger interview and Creepy tears into her. When the blogger shows up, it’s obvious she probably had a fling with Creepy. Are there any more characters on this show I can dislike? If you were minutely intimate with Jeff, you get put in the gross pile.
As Will and that cutie songwriter Kevin are leaving the studio, Kev tells Will he doesn’t think they should work together any longer because Will is uncomfortable around him. Will cops an attitude and bails. So our homo remains a homophobe. As an honorary gay, Will, I must say you are about to get your ass put in the gross pile.
On the road with the Chex Mixes, Scar Scar gets flowers in her hotel room from Dr. Hottiepants and guess what? His name is Caleb. Anywho, Gunnar checks the Twitter feed and it seems someone has tweeted something rude about Scarlett’s going bonkers in Chicago a year ago. Welcome to Chi town, my sweet. So, instead of letting it go, she decides to start a twitter war with the rude ass twatter.
Back at Merchants, Layla gets her panties in a twist because she learns the blogger has a real past with Creepy and stomps out of there. I swear if she takes a bunch of pills and throws herself in a swimming pool again…
Rayna is still hanging out at Deacon’s house trying to prove she isn’t going anywhere and they get into a shouting match because Deacon is convinced he is going to die. “Nothing matters!” he screams. In response, Rayna asks “Nothing matters?!?!” and she proceeds to smash his guitar on the ground. Repeatedly. When did Rayna get so violent all of the sudden? Rayna finally asks him if he even believes in them anymore. He didn’t answer and she walks away, saying he broke her heart.
Creepy chases Layla out of the restaurant and confesses to Layla that blogger chick was nothing but a booty call and Layla asks him if that is what they have. He can’t commit to anything and Layla storms off.
In a not-so-remote area, Teddy meets with the hoochie mama in his car, telling her the FBI does indeed have her under surveillance because they are targeting prostitution rings. She asks him if he can protect her and he insists it’s out of his jurisdiction. But she turns the tables and explains that if she is arrested, she will tell them about him if it will get her out of trouble. Instead, they decide she could disappear for awhile, but she will need a couple hundred grand to do that. Teddy doesn’t have that kind of money and needs to get it before they arrest the hoochie.
Sadie moseys into Luke’s recording session and likes what she sees and hears. Oh no, Nashville writers. These two cannot become an item. I really like Sadie and we all know Puke looks good on no one. Just ask the priest in The Exorcist. Anywho, Puke steps out of the session to chat with her about the song he is singing. It’s not working at all. So Sadie ends up doing it with him. The song, not the deed, you freaks. And the worst part of all? She makes him sound good. I didn’t know that was possible.
In her Chicago hotel room, the trolls on social media have brought Scarlett to tears and I am kind of kicking myself for not being on twitter to join in. I am so kidding. Kinda. But anyway Gunnar and Avery want to turn this into a songwriting moment. They give Scarlett her chance to put her real story of going cray cray into a song. So, it’s Chex Mix with nuts?
Rayna is a glutton for punishment and still hanging around with Deacon and they start to talk about Maddie and how he can’t tell her he is sick because it will break her heart. Well, hell Deacon, you just broke her mama’s heart, you met as well get a matching set.
Teddy tracks down Creepy at the gym and asks him for money to pay off the hooker. The gym? You just know Creepy is lunk. Anyway, Creepy tells him to take a hike, but not before Teddy tells him that the only person he cares for is himself. Umm… Ted man… that has been obvious since you first met Creepy.
Will can’t write a song on his own, so to deal with his writer’s block, he heads on over to see his old standby: his beard Layla, who explains to him that songwriting needs to come from real emotion and they both discover Will has never been in love before. Later, Will finds Kevin and apologizes. He tells Kevin that he might be able to understand what he is going through.
Juliette is getting tired of Avery’s constant calls to check in – this time it’s from the concert venue, but give him a break. Most women would kill for a guy that caring and concerned. Nearby Scarlett is… fretting? The vapid look on her face can mean lots of things. Gunnar tries to give her a pep talk, takes her hand and explains he is there for her.
Back at the Heartbreak Hotel (Deacon and Raynaville), Rayna is still trying to talk Deacon into letting her be a part of his life, saying she wants her daughters to see what true love looks like, even if it’s just for a short while. She also tells him there isn’t anything he can do to protect them from the pain of his illness. She wants him to embrace the joy of life and to “fight for us.” He shuts her up by kissing her. That’s not how I would have handled things, Deacon, but good show!
Creepy finishes the burn of gay church and heads back over to Layla’s place where he tries to illuminate her on how he isn’t good with relationships and intimacy. But he wants to try with Layla. GROSS. GROSS. GROSS!!!! After their boom-boom sesh, Layla realizes her relationship with Jeff is similar to the one she had with Will. In both instances, she was with a man she thought she could change. Realizing she can’t make Jeff love her, she declares their relationship a business one and gets out of bed.
I just did a standing slow clap for that girl. Our baby beard is growing up.
Ready to take Chicago by storm, Chex Mix takes the stage and Scarlett owns the joint by singing the song they wrote for her to TESTIFY! In the future, can we just have her sing all of her lines? She is so talented… just not with Mississippi accents. Afterwards, she tells Gunnar she couldn’t do it without him. Interrupting their conversation is a surprise visit from Dr. Hottiepants, leaving Gunnar sulking.
Now that Rayna and Deacon have had make up sex, they are all happy and going to face this challenge together and sparkles and rainbows and glitter.
Accepting an invitation from Puke to have coffee, Sadie listens to him whine about seeing Rayna after their breakup. They start to open up to one another and I can feel the vomit in the back of my throat. At the end of the night, Sadie walks back to her car in a parking garage and crazy ex-husband Pete is waiting for her.
With the city finance director in his office, Teddy decides he wants to set up a fund to do something about the old canning factory near the river. You see, it’s absolutely crawling with criminal activity and Teddy wants to expedite the fundraising, even if it means to break protocol. His financial dude isn’t down with that nonsense and hits the road.
Caleb (Dr. Hottiepants) tells Scarlett he showed up to see her, but he has no expectations. He got his own hotel room and everything. Gunnar is being a whiney bitch about Caleb’s visit and Avery tells him to act fast if he wants to rekindle his flame with the Sherpa girl. When Gunnar does finally get up the nerve to go to Scarlett’s hotel room to talk, she is already at Dr. Hottiepants’ hotel room door.
Creepy #2 shows back up and this time it’s in Teddy’s office and Teddy needs something done. He wants the finance director’s background thoroughly checked for any questionable closet skeletons. Teddy is his name and blackmail is his game, ya’ll.
Back in his hotel room, Avery calls Juliette and asks her to hold the phone close to her belly because he has a song to sing for their daughter. He plays a very sweet song called “This Is What I Need to Say.”
At Rayna’s house, Deacon and Rayna let Maddie and Daphne know they are back together. They also tell them about his cancer, which they obviously don’t take very well.
As Sadie fishes for the gun in her purse in the parking garage, Pete continues to creep towards her until she pulls the weapon. They struggle and she shoots him. That is when Luke pulls up on the scene… and… well, the end. At least for this episode.
And hopefully for Pete.
NASHVILLE recap: "That's the Way Love Goes" (season 3 episode 15)
NASHVILLE recap: "I Can't Keep Away from You" (season 3 episode 16)
NASHVILLE recap: "This Just Ain't a Good Day for Leavin'" (season 3 episode 17)