March of the Kings


Drag King – A woman who, generally for public entertainment, dons men’s clothes and adopts a stereotypically masculine demeanor while on stage. As with drag queens, a drag king’s performance can range from a silly, overdone parody to a more natural, subtle depiction of masculinity. Not to be confused with a Transsexual.

It seems that, for whatever reason, drag queens have been stealing the limelight from drag kings for years. They headline at more bars, lead more parades and emcee at more Pride events than do their butch counterparts. 

I don’t have the answers for you so you’ll have to go asking somewhere else, but I can tell you that the kings need some love, too. They deserve our respect for being able to strap down their “girls” tight enough to fit under a breast plate. It’s a lot harder to hide voluptuous curves than it is to create them. And try buying a beard that looks realistic.

Since your king needs to be out rubbing elbows so he can slate some public appearances to rival the queens, a scooter from BC Cycles would make a perfect gift this Christmas. Visit for pricing.

Buying men’s clothes is easy enough, but it takes talent to look studly in them and not like a 12-year-old boy or your uncle Cecil. So reward your king with gifts that will make it easier to look studly on stage.

A subscription to GQ Magazine could help him bone up on the latest trends in fashion so he can ooze testosterone and swoon tips out of the audience.  Visit for subscription information. Throw some Ace bandages and a roll of duct tape into his stocking and he’s set for another round of performances.